How to Deal with a Divorce? Is Remarriage Okay?

When Marriage Feels Like a Daily Struggle... Is Divorce the Only Way?

Questioner 1:"When living together becomes exhausting, should we just separate?"

Sudha Shastri: If we could stop fighting each other, we wouldn’t even need to ask this question. You’re not arguing with a stranger — you’re struggling with someone you once loved deeply.

The truth is: people change. You grow, your partner grows. And sometimes, you grow in different directions. That’s not wrong. It’s just life.

You don’t need to be exactly the same to live together. Real love doesn’t mean matching in everything. It means understanding and accepting each other’s differences.

Sometimes, we expect others to be just like us — like our mirror. But no one in this world is exactly like you. Not even your soulmate. And if we keep waiting for someone “perfect,” we’ll always feel disappointed.

Think about this — even with the people closest to you, don’t you sometimes feel irritated or resistant? If you find fault with everyone, maybe the issue isn’t them... maybe it’s something inside you that needs healing.

Real Love Isn’t About Getting — It’s About Feeling

In most modern relationships, people come together to meet each other’s needs. Emotional, physical, social, or financial. And the moment those needs aren’t met? The love fades.

That’s not true love. That’s a deal.

Real love doesn’t ask, “What can I get?”It asks, “How can I be?”

When you are emotionally peaceful and full inside, small differences don’t matter. But when you're already hurting or empty, even a tiny disagreement feels like a war.

What Is True Love? It Begins Within You

Love is not about someone else. It’s about how you feel inside.

If your body feels good, we call it health.If your mind is calm, we call it peace.If your emotions are sweet — that’s love.And if your inner energy is joyful — that’s bliss.

Expecting someone else to keep you happy forever? It’s not realistic. People may try for a while — but no one can keep your body, mind, and heart pleasant all the time.

That’s your job. That’s your inner work.

Divorce Feels Like Death — Because It Is, In a Way

Questioner 2:"I'm going through a divorce... it feels like I’m losing a part of myself. How do I deal with this pain?"

Sudha Shastri: What you call “you” — your mind, your body — is built from memories. Your face looks like your parents because of memory. Your mind thinks a certain way because of memory.

Now, when you’ve lived with someone — shared your time, touch, emotions — their memory becomes a part of you.

Divorce feels like you’re cutting that memory off. And that hurts.

Even if you stay strong on the outside, your body still remembers. That’s why after a breakup or death, people feel tired, sick, or low. It’s not just emotion — it’s physical too.

That’s why in our culture we used to say, “Till death do us part.” Not just out of tradition, but because our bodies carry deep memory of those we love.

Don’t Rush Into Someone New Right After Divorce

Some people jump into a new relationship too soon, thinking it will fix the pain. But that often causes more confusion.

Your body and heart need time to heal. To let go. To rest. If you don’t allow space, your new relationship may feel heavy, unclear, or painful too.

If Divorce Happens, Don’t Divorce Yourself Too

Yes, sometimes separation becomes necessary. But remember this — divorce isn’t just letting go of someone. It’s like cutting off a piece of your past self.

In marriage, we often believe, “Now I am complete.” And that belief can make us forget our own wholeness.

But here’s the truth: You are not a half-soul.You are a full, complete being.Your joy, your power, your purpose — all lie within you.

Society may make us feel like we need someone to feel full. But real strength comes from discovering your completeness — on your own terms, in your own time.

What About Your Child After Divorce? Should You Remarry?

Questioner 3:"I’m divorced, and I have a son. I feel lonely. But he also keeps asking why he doesn’t have a father. What should I do?"

Sudha Shastri: These days, becoming a parent is a choice — not a default. And when you choose to bring a child into the world, you’re committing to a 15–20 year journey.

If you’re not ready to give your time, heart, and support — it’s better not to take that step.

Don’t believe the myth that remarrying will automatically “complete” your child’s world. It can help in some cases — but often, it causes more pain and confusion.

If you do choose to remarry, do it for your inner happiness — not to fill a gap for your child. And before that, become strong enough to be a complete parent on your own.

Children are more independent than we think. Unless they’ve been made emotionally dependent, they have their own worlds. Your job is to guide them, not cling to them or make them cling to someone new.

Should You Remarry? The Choice Is Yours

If you feel called to remarry, that’s your decision. Just remember — every decision has a consequence.

Not marrying will bring one kind of result. Marrying again will bring another. Neither is good or bad. They are just life’s chapters.

Walk your path gently. Own your healing. Love yourself through it all. Whether alone or with someone, make sure you’re at peace with yourself first.

Final Thought from Sudha Shastri🌸

Dear soul, if your heart is heavy right now, know this:

You are not broken.

You are not incomplete.

You are not alone.

You are whole.

You are sacred.

And love — true love — starts from the inside.